How To Keep Walking When You Are Walking Into Opposition
My wife and I are taking a few days away, staying at a cottage on the beach in Kill Devil Hills, North Carolina. (Gotta love that town’s name). This morning, I decided to take a walk alone on the beach. It was about 42 degrees and the wind was gusting. The waves were crashing on the shore with a great degree of violence. Even in these conditions, I love walking along the shore. It's a place of bliss for me, despite the harsher elements.
When I started my prayer walk, I decided to walk with the wind at my back. My face was in the sun, so I felt a little of its warmth. My pace was quickened because the force of the wind was pushing me forward. The sand beneath my feet was soft, but it was not so squishy as to make me fatigued. My AirPods were tuned into some worship music. It was a glorious, invigorating walk for about 2.5 miles.
Then I decided to turn around and walk back. I was completely unprepared for the contrast. The wind was now in my face. The same force that had propelled me forward was pressing against me, making it difficult to take the next step. Sand was flying everywhere, stinging me in the face. The sun was now at my back and my entire body was chilled by the cold wind. My first thought was, "There is no way I am going to make all the way back like this! Maybe I should call Melodie and ask her to drive down to pick me up."
Then I thought, "This is what it felt like to pastor in 2020!"
Prior to March of last year, it felt like I was walking with the wind at my back and the sun in my face. It was challenging, because there are always moments that feel cold and the soft ground demands extra energy to keep pace. But overall, the pace was invigorating, challenging, and refreshing. I could see my progress. I could make it further than I thought. It was a fun journey.
Then all of the sudden, the situation felt completely flipped. The wind was in my face. The sand was stinging my cheeks. There was pressure with every step. The temperature dropped rapidly, growing colder and colder with each new crisis. There were times in 2020 when I thought to myself, "There is no way that I am going to make it through this."
Carey Niewhoff reflected on the recent stats from the Barna organization, stating that what I was feeling was being felt by pastors around the country in 2020 and 2021.
Barna Group polled pastors twice in 2021. In January, 29% of pastors said they had seriously thought about leaving ministry in the last year. In October, that number jumped to 38%. Dig a little deeper, and almost half of all pastors under 45 are thinking of quitting ministry. Women also have a higher incidence of thinking about quitting than male pastors. I talked to one leader who said he feels jealous that someone is leaving because, as the leader, he can’t even leave, and yet he feels exhausted and demoralized too.
So to the discouraged pastor or leader, I want to make some observations for you, based on my walk on the beach today:
#1 - Keep Walking Forward
The first lesson that I learned from my walk is that it is possible to walk forward, even with great resistance. The same wind that was supporting me before, was now opposing me, but I didn’t cause the natural elements and conditions. I was just walking toward home in the midst of it.
The same could be said of the conditions of 2020. In most cases, you did nothing to cause the atmospheric shift. It just happened.
The virus appeared.
Our government attempted to handle the virus by imposing restrictions.
People responded to try to stay safe or to defend their freedoms.
Injustices occurred.
Reactions to those injustices were voiced.
Politics became more intense.
Disputes between family and friends arose.
The wind was blowing and the sand was stinging your face. It was cold. It was tough to walk in the sinking sands. But we all needed to just keep walking forward. Remember, walking doesn't change when the climate and atmosphere around us changes. We can still walk forward, even with great resistance.
#2 - Focus on Every Next Step
The second thing that I noticed was that I became discouraged if I looked up and saw how far I had to go to get home. The more I thought about the length and difficulty of the journey, the more I wanted to quit. So I just started to look down at my feet.
I decided to keep my strides on pace with the rhythm of the music on my Airpods. One step at a time. Moving forward. As an act of worship. Then a gust of wind would hit me and knock me off my stride. But I just returned to form. Do the basics. Keep on walking forward.
Move forward. Get up every morning. Spend time in prayer. Read the Word. Care about people. Seek to serve. Use your gifts. Listen. Learn. Grieve. Repeat.
#3 - Take a Moment To Rest
After a few minutes of walking against the wind, I was exhausted. It's funny, that when the wind is at your back and the sun is on your face, you feel like you can walk forever. That’s a lot like what it felt like in 2019. I felt carried in many ways. But when the winds shifted direction in 2020, it felt like I was facing a force that wanted to push me to the ground.
As I was on my beach walk, I realized that it was okay to stop for a minute. I could turn back toward the sun and let it warm my face.I could turn my back against the wind, and take a break from the blowing sand. I could even sit down if I needed to catch my breath. When I was ready, I could get back up and walk forward against the wind again.
#4 - Find a New Path
After ten minutes of walking against the wind, I began to strategize how to deal with the elements. I considered moving closer to the water where the sand was more solid, but the tide was coming in, so I was forced to walk on the softest parts of the beach, where my feet would sink down a few inches with every step. But I didn't have to stay on the beach. I didn't have to stay in the same place and posture to keep moving in the right direction. I could make the choice to walk off the beach to the street, just fifty yards away. I guess you could call that innovation. My circumstances dictated that I rethought how I was moving forward, where I was moving forward, and what I needed to do to see greater progress.
Just that one change picked up both my mood and my pace. There was still fierce wind, but from this new position it was less intense. There was still blowing sand, but the oceanfront houses blocked most of it. The biggest improvement was traction. I had my feet on something solid.
I wondered to myself, "Is this compromise? Should I just tough it out and do it the hard way?" But then the thought came to me, "It’s not how you are doing it, it’s where you are going that counts." The vision didn’t change, but my methods did.
#5 - Don't Quit
Even with the adjustments I made, I still felt like calling my wife and having her come and pick me up. But I felt like that would have been taking an escape from the journey. Was it worth it? Should I keep doing this? Should it be this difficult? Maybe I should just give it up and take the easy way out?
Do you know that so much about longevity in ministry, consistency in sobriety, sustaining any kind of positive change in your life has to do with your focus on progress. Stay the course. Don’t talk yourself out of something. Don't quit! You don’t have to be perfect. Your journey doesn’t have to be perfect. You just need to keep walking in the right direction.
#6 - Enjoy the Journey
When I decided not to quit, I knew that I was in for a long haul. And the Holy Spirit spoke to me. I know, I know that sounds super spiritual. But remember that I had set out on a prayer walk. I felt Him remind me, “I am still here. I have not left you. I am more than enough, even for this. Why not enjoy this walk with me as we walk through this together?"
That changed everything for me. I started focusing on the goodness of God. I could enjoy the view of the ocean, even from a distance. I could still breathe in the smell of the ocean air. I started to thank God that I could see, hear, smell, and walk. I started to sing in worship. And as I watched the seagulls flying through the wind, I remembered the old song, “His Eye is on the Sparrow" and played the Whitney Houston rendition of that song on Spotify. For a few moments, I forgot about the discomfort and I drank deeply of this beautiful moment with God.
#7 - Keep Your Vision Fixed on Getting Home.
Finally, on the horizon I could see the building where we were staying. Home! It was still at a distance. But now, my pace quickened. It’s not that far. Only a few more paces. I can do this. And I made it back safe and sound…against the wind, through the difficult conditions, and finally at my destination.
I am not going to lie. When I arrived, I felt exhilarated. Job done. Adversity faced. Goal achieved. In many ways that walk back against the wind, left me feeling more satisfied than the walk with the wind at my back. It required something of me. I met the challenge. I survived. I succeeded.
Hopefully, you can see the parallels here and this little beach illustration will help you decide NOT TO QUIT!